play dead. it stops the hurting.*

Well, the sad facts are just that … I hate responsibility, I feel like I have this OCD where things need to work out my way or the highway. (this is why I have always dropped ‘quit’ what I could not handle in the past?) I have the want and the need to be a perfectionist, but I never succeed. I procrastinate and then when I wait to the last minute to do things. I surely rush and never get them done adequately, as I would have like to get them done. And yes, you could say that there is this one easy answer to all of this and then everything would be not-what-it-is-now. But, oh how things in life are so much easier said than done. Always.

Where oh, where are you the hope of yesterday...not even a mere 24 hours gone...where have you decided to hide away? I want you back...

And then there is the fact that I take everything and I do mean everything, personally. As personal as it gets.

*unfortunately 'playing dead' is a figment of the imagination. One in which you cannot hide out in for very long.